Ah… the countdown to New Years Eve… a time for new beginnings & making resolutions.
Most people are pretty laid back about it… they vow to eat less, work out more, quit a bad habit, pick up a new hobby, become more organized or spend more time with family & friends.
I on the other hand, begin to reassess everything. As the end of the year draws closer, I find myself pensively preoccupied, very often retreating within myself… mulling over my flaws, trying to pick just one thing to work on; gradually becoming overwhelmed & finally… exhausted.
With the cheerful hubbub of Christmas now behind us, I once again found myself feeling contemplative. At first, my thought patterns seemed harmless enough & to my credit, I did make a concerted effort to stay lighthearted & optimistic. I tried to distract myself by devoting my free time to my home & family, but by mid-week, I began to feel myself more & more reflective & by last night I was just plain crabby.
I woke again this morning in an irritable mood. I wandered out to the couch, filled a mug with coffee & curled up with my Bible & prayer journal. As I opened the cover of the journal the following quote hit me between the eyes:
“It is a great grace of God to practice self-examination; but too much is as bad as too little.” –Teresa of Avila
Aha… In that moment, I made the decision to stop obsessing about this whole ‘New Year’s Resolution’ thing. Instead, I’m going to take a deep breath, let it go & leave it up to God. I'm going to praise Him for the many ways He has grown me this past year & pray that I will approach 2012 with my arms open wide to receive whatever it is that He has to teach me. After all, He knows me better than I know myself...
Know that the LORD is God,
It is he who made us, and we are his;
we are his people, the sheep of his pasture. –Psalm 100:3
we are his people, the sheep of his pasture. –Psalm 100:3
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