bubble girl...

Cultivate these things.

 Immerse yourself in them.

The people will all see you mature right before their eyes!

Keep a firm grasp on both your character and your teaching.

Don’t be diverted.

Just keep at it.

Both you and those who hear you will experience salvation.

-1 Timothy 4:15 & 16 (the Message)

I am a work in progress... always.

AHHHH! STAY OUT OF MY BUBBLE!

This was ever more apparent this past week as I found myself back to my old work place for a regional staff meeting.  I had gone to see some of my old coworkers, one of which I had nominated for an award. She had just been informed that she had received it & was still I think in a bit of a shock. This precious quiet lady is an unsung hero really. One who works diligently behind the scenes to make the rest of us look good. As she bashfully thanked me for nominating her, I was so overcome with excitement that I just reached out to hug her. She let me but she had this look... you know the one of pure terror.  The one where someone you vaguely know is about to come into your bubble.

In that moment I realized... I have officially switched to other side & become one of  'those people'.  You see... I used to have a great big bubble. Which was comfortable & safe & not the slightest bit messy. Hubs used to tease me about my wooden hugs, & stiff back patting & frozen smiles.

I wouldn't be completely honest if I didn't take it a bit further to say that this went far beyond the whole hugging thing. I very rarely let anyone inside the bubble to see the for real me. But as God has grown me over the years, He's shown me not only how to hug involuntarily & GASP... how to actually enjoy it... He's shown me how to let down my guard & let people in.

I know that this is risk. That when you open yourself up to others you run the risk of being hurt. I also know that when you open up yourself to others you get to experience the best of life. After all, God created us to be in deep fellowship with each other.

Yeah so... Don't fight it.
You know I'm coming right up on into
your bubble right?

Here's the dealio... It's hard to change things that are safe & comfortable to us. It's easier to make excuses about our personalities & not take responsibility for what God is calling us to work on. This has always been true for me. There are times I long for the quiet, peaceful, introverted bubble I used to live in. There's so much less drama back in that thing. But I know deep down inside my soul that God is calling me to step out of the shadows, to engage in the beautiful, messy world of people. & that because He is calling me, He will give me the strength & courage to live there with JOY.

"That which tears open our souls, those holes that splatter our sight, may actually become the thin, open places to see through the mess of this place to the heart-aching beauty beyond.

To Him. To the God whom we endlessly crave."                

- Ann Voskamp, One Thousand Gifts: A Dare to Live Fully Right Where You Are